reflections

tag: it feels challenging to recall all that this past year held, time being the illusive companion that it is. what i do recall fully and fondly are the amazing places i've lived--both the lands and homes that held me--and the amazing beings (of the 2 & 4 legged varieties) i've been blessed to have in my life. and for these things i'm most grateful. as i contemplate the upcoming year (a mere 10 minutes away!), i realize that among all the dreams, inspirations, plans and hopes my heart carries, my biggest desire is to continue to cultivate deeply within myself so that these blessings will continue to show up and grow in my life. or perhaps it's so that i will recognize them when they are there. and even if there are times these blessings are sparse (or at least i'm perceiving it that way), i will be able to call on the inner strength and love i've cultivated and continue to shine with radiant appreciation for all the gifts the world is perpetually offering. and of course there will be dark moments. may i find appreciation for those too...for the teachers that they are.

a few weeks ago, i attended a potent women's circle with a group of friends both old and newly met. before the gathering, we were asked to consider what we wanted to bring into our lives in the coming year. for me, the answer was (and is) inner peace and intuition. once in the circle, we were all able to offer a prayer of invitation to other women in our lives who might benefit from the strength and support of what we were creating as well as calling in any goddesses to support us in our process. i called in Athena (Inner Wisdom) and Eirene (Peace), inviting them into the circle as well as requesting their continued guidance. since that magical gathering, i have noticed them both showing up in different ways...in dreamtime, in feeling my intuition and stillness, in drawing their cards from the oracle deck.

Andres atop Pinnacle Peak

i do so appreciate when messages come to remind me, to presence me, to slow me down, to connect me to source. today my reminder was a playful one. Andres & i are visiting his grandma & dad in Arizona. we decided to explore somewhere new and get in a little hike. on our drive to Pinnacle Peak, i took a wrong turn. i realized it right away and pulled over to the side of the road. while waiting for a clear path to turn around i half-jokingly said, "we must have come this way for some reason". the next moment a roadrunner zipped out of the bushes next to our truck. i laughed and said "see. there it is." it darted into the bushes again. not having seen one so close before, i wanted more of a look. and it came back! we sat there for another few minutes while he (?) weaved in and out of hiding, munched on a few bugs eventually took interest in our idling vehicle. head bobbing up and down, he creeped closer and closer, tail straight up and intently eyeing Andres. then another car went by, he ran off and we turned around and got on our way again.

when we got home from our hike, i looked up roadrunner medicine. the gist of what i received is roadrunner teaches us to think quickly on our feet and choose the best direction, but to avoid making our decisions based on what others would have us do. hhhmmmm. sounds like more inner wisdom stuff. funny, this morning i drew Athena (again!) and from the Osho deck i drew The Burden, which basically reminds us to not take on the expectations of others. i suppose we can always find meaning if we are looking for it. and i often am. and i feel like i found it again today. repeated reminders to trust in myself. as i continue to work with this, i thank each of you for the ways in which you support, love and shine your light on me! may your 2013 bring some of what you want and all of what is best for you! 

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